Just when I think I am becoming more flexible, BAM! Something comes up that I have to deal with. And I don’t always handle it with grace and dignity. *Ahem* Maybe one day…..
Last week we missed church with my youngest and I being sick. I hate missing it, but there was no choice. You just hope and pray these sicknesses end there, but do they ever?
Monday came and my husband got on a plane to go across the country. With him out of town, I knew there would be hiccups. I knew I would miss adult conversation in the evening. But after two days of being home writing all day, Wednesday was my chance to get out! Bible study and a hospice visit! I was in party mode.
Until right before I was leaving, and the school nurse called. Y’all, that is never a good call. Sigh. I had to pick up a sick child (the other one) and take her to the doctor. No adult time. No freedom. Just me cleaning up and airing out the house. Pity party ensued.
I am ashamed to admit that after getting my baby girl settled and the house cleaned, I didn’t take the time to be with her. The guilt over being home and not writing got to me. I plugged away not getting much done. But it didn’t occur to me to watch Swiss Family Robinson with her (on a separate couch of course.) I didn’t take the time as it is flying by. This is time I can’t get back, moments I should be cherishing.
Yesterday we all overslept, so the girls had to be driven to school. I started worrying early if I was going to get everything done. Then God pointed out to me how I have been acting. He doesn’t want me to go around in crisis mode. His goal is not for me to assume the worst in everything that changes.
Maybe God is trying to tell me something when these things come up. If He can’t get my attention another way, more drastic methods might be necessary.
When did I get this way? Why do I fret about the day to day like this? I know I can trust God. I know He will take care of us.
I want to start looking at things that come up as divine interruptions. God is probably up there saying “Hey I am here. Remember me?” He may have something for me to see or learn. He may want me to slow down and take a breath. I tend to fixate on what is in front of me. I would not say obsess, but someone else might. At times I keep pushing when I really need a break. If I can’t see it, God sends an engraved invitation. Apparently I don’t pick up on subtle hints.
Next time my plans are broken, I pray I look to God for what He wants me to see. I want my eyes and heart to be open to an interruption from God. And I will pray the same for you.
Linking with Holley Gerth.