Help My Unbelief

Waiting seems to be the story of my life for the last few years. Now I am beginning to see there will always be times for activity and times for waiting. The ebb and flow of life. When I recognize those times of waiting, what I do is just as important as when I am in the bustling times.

This weekend, my family had a twenty four hour period of excruciating waiting. I refreshed my email way too often, wondered if my phone was working, and fretted many hours away. It was literally twenty three and a half hours of that.

Finally, I stopped. I had been praying, but this time I prayed differently. I told God I was sorry for behaving like this and for not trusting Him. I do trust Him, but something had been broken or disconnected in those hours. This prayer became one of those times of confession where I felt so bad about it that I cried. Maybe the world wouldn’t understand why my faith disappearing was so bad, but I knew. My heart had to break open and feel how it must make God feel. I was so sad. But then I didn’t feel sad anymore. God wanted me to understand, but only for a minute. Then I felt peace and light. I was back to knowing who is in control and who isn’t.

Within minutes, my phone rang. It was what I had been waiting for. Did y’all read that? Maybe ten minutes after I confessed my temporary insanity, God made things happen. That was not a coincidence! I had to learn a lesson and right what was wrong, which wouldn’t have happened if the call came earlier.

It appears I am still short on patience and trust. God knows I will need these qualities the rest of my life, so He keeps building them in Β me. It is hard at the time, but each time it makes me stronger. There will always be circumstances out of my control that take their sweet time. I have to learn to keep my dependence on God or confess when I don’t.

Sometimes admitting to God that we haven’t had faith is the most difficult thing to do, but it has the most benefits. God knows the condition of our hearts, but we still have to confess our weakness to Him. He promised to give us strength when we need it. Psalm 29:11 says The Lord gives strength to His people; the Lord blesses His people with peace.

Even though our house selling situation is up in the air again, I am choosing to trust God. God always proves faithful to me, and I am fixing on His will over my own. He will work it all out.

 

 

I am linking with Holley Gerth!

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26 thoughts on “Help My Unbelief

  1. Sarah,
    I so love this! Yes, I think that admitting to God that we are lacking in faith is sometimes the most honest thing we can do and he knows our hearts and we are safe to tell him so. Praying for your house situation and I’m anticipating with you what God will do to show you that he can take care of all your needs as you trust in him, and he might even amaze you along the way! πŸ™‚

  2. Hi Sarah! So glad to see you at Coffee for Your Heart. That prayer, “I believe. Help my unbelief” is one of my favorite. So real. So honest. I don’t like waiting either, and I’ve often reacted like you, looking at the clock, checking e-mail so much it’s not even funny. Let’s grow in just resting. Trusting. πŸ™‚ Blessings on your house sale.

  3. Jesus wept, He wrestled with His Father. I love that we can do the same. He gets it, He hears our cries, understands our disappointments and fears.

    And I can’t help believe that He’s going to do more than you can ask or imagine when it comes to your house. Absolutely, friend.

  4. I love the honesty of your post. I also know what it’s like to want to sell a house. My husband and I want to sell ours too, but we keep hearing that we can’t sell it for the price that we would need to break even. It might be years before it sells, but we will hang in there. I know it’s hard to wait. I believe your faith will be rewarded in God’s perfect time.

  5. ugh waiting is sooo hard! I’m with ya girl!! Thanks be to God that he lets us come to Him no matter how crazy we feel we are. Hang in there! God’s got this. Thanks for sharing your heart- we all need to be reminded : )

  6. Your post made me smile! I’ve had many of those moments where once (and only once) I let go, God moves. I’ve also had moments where unbelief clouded my vision and I clung tight to it. So blessed we serve a gracious God who loves and accepts us in both places…in all places, but keeps transforming our faith into what He desires it be. Thanks for sharing your heart so honestly! Stopping by from Coffee for Your ❀️.

  7. Thanks for sharing Sarah- Comforting to see God at work and know he has our hearts in mind even in the waiting- I don’t like waiting at all- and have often felt this way too! Great to hear your story and how in the letting go and trusting Him you found peace. It has encouraged me this morning!! πŸ™‚ Thank you!! I will pray for your house situation too!

  8. Thank you for this encouragement to wait and trust, Sarah. I, too, am so short on trust. I love your inspiring observation – “My heart had to break open and feel how it must make God feel.” Wow! So true, isn’t it? Praying God will show His power also in your house selling situation!

  9. Oh, I have been there so many times, Sarah! I can completely relate :). Your honesty is beautiful. The timing will be just as it should be, but I know that doesn’t always make the waiting any easier. Many prayers for you!

  10. What a lesson! Never fun ones to learn, but so amazing to see how God works. I remember being so nervous to start my blog, terrified to click “publish” for the first time. Until I finally prayed over it and clicked ‘publish’ in trust that God had a plan. Immediately, a peace washed over me and I wasn’t nervous or anxious at all. How much stress could I save in my life if only I could remember to trust and pray immediately every time. πŸ™‚ Good luck with the house selling!

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