Friends With More Gray Hair

My whole adult life, I have gravitated toward older people. (Calm down, people I hang out with. I said older, not old.) I think I probably assumed they had it all together, and it would rub off on me. I have definitely absorbed some wisdom, but let’s not get carried away.

The older we get, the more secure we are in our identity and the less we care what others think. Can I get an Amen? I just love hearing people’s stories and the amazing twists and turns their lives have taken that they didn’t see coming.

Growing up, I saw my parents’ friendships and have emulated them. (Several I consider my friends now too. What a cool transformation!) My parents showed me it is important to have friends that are like you and ones that are different. They had a wide variety.

When I think of older friends, one lady comes to my mind who God sent me for a season. Right after college, I started attending a church and sat near this woman, Dorothy. We found out Mom was sick again, and Dorothy reminded me of her. I began confiding in her after services and she would hug me while I cried. We formed a friendship that was, of course, just what I needed. I only went to that church a few months, but God knew I could use someone who wasn’t close to the situation or close to my age. I needed someone who had more life experience to help me navigate the murky waters of my feelings and fears. Friends my age were nervous around me because they didn’t know what to say. The fact that I let myself cry with Dorothy shows how comfortable she made me instantly. We lost touch but I think of her and smile.

Then there are friends who are just a few years older and have kids who are slightly older than mine. The advice they have shared has been priceless over the years.

I have hung out and volunteered with many people over the years whose kids are my age, and I love it! They have seen God come through and can reassure me He will again. I adore the time I spend with them, but I am wondering one thing.

Is it time for me to befriend someone younger than me?

Gulp.

I really do prefer the company of those who are older than me, but at what point do I consider it time to start passing down what I have learned? I don’t want to be greedy and soak up all the goodness myself. I want to be more of a sponge that gets wrung out over others who need it. I want to be used to pass on peace, wisdom, and joy when they need it.

God will bring people in my life at the right time. I hope I am paying attention when that happens!

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Linking with Holley Gerth

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8 thoughts on “Friends With More Gray Hair

  1. “The older we get, the more secure we are in our identity and the less we care what others think.” Amen, sister! That is the greatest thing about aging. I so appreciate my older friends and the wisdom they bring me. I’ve finally started trying to hand some of that down to younger generations, but it seems like it’s taken forever for me to get here. I think mainly because even though I’m 46, I’m a new Christian which makes me feel like I’ve just recently started having wisdom to share :). The younger generation you serve will surely be blessed, Sarah. Keep soaking up wisdom and God will put the women in your path for you to pass it on to!

  2. reminds me of an analogy our pastor used about faith – it’s like breathing, inhaling and exhaling. You need to do both to stay alive. Soaking up all the wisdom, experience and support of your older friends is like inhaling – and now you’re ready to start exhaling into the next generation. Lovely! We all need to do more of that!

  3. Both of my daughters love hanging out with my age friends too. 🙂 (older, not old—I like how you distinguished that, ha). I see it as a sign of maturity when we aim to learn from those who have lived more life than us. I love being around older people too. But yeah, there comes a day when we realize that WE are the older ones (at least older than someone!) and need to be that person for someone else. Beautiful, Sarah.

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