Last week was rough, y’all. Waiting is not my strongest attribute, and it was my second week of waiting on biopsy results. The time frame they gave me came and went, and I still hadn’t heard anything. Fear and uncertainty built up in me by my day off, Friday.
A few weeks ago, I had a dermatologist appointment. I go once or twice a year and they always seem to find suspicious spots. This time they biopsied 4 moles, the most ever for me. That is pretty routine for me, but waiting over 2 weeks for them to call to tell me the results is not normal. I tend to get stuck inside my head and imagine what could be going on, what could be wrong.
Trying to get my mind off of my growing fear did not work so well as one of the spots was in a bad place and hurt the entire 2 weeks. How do I not think about it then? Last Friday was my day off, and I actually had nothing to do. I could rest! Instead I thought too much. By that night, I just wanted to cry. But then, something amazing happened. I read a blog post by Becky Keife that really helped me. You can find it here.
The verse: “Be still and know that I am God” is one we all know and gloss over. Not this time. I began to breathe more normally and relax some. I pulled out my Psalms coloring book and colored pencils and found that verse to color. My girls joined me and we had a little party. 🙂 I played some worship music as well as introduced them to some old school Amy Grant. We had a fun time!
Be still and know that I am God has come to me several times over the past week, as well as other similar verses. Psalm 94:18-19 says, “When I said, ‘My foot is slipping,’ Your unfailing love, Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, Your consolation brought me joy.” The other day I read Psalm 61:2: “From the ends of the earth I call to You, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I.” Yes, Jesus is my Rock! Having these verses flow through me was just what I needed. And when I started to forget, He would bring me more verses.
A couple of days ago, I finally got the phone call I had been waiting for. All 4 were atypical, not cancerous. I will always have to be careful, but I want to also remember to be still. I can’t let fear run my life. Being still and focusing on God brings me peace like nothing else. I just need to be reminded sometimes.
Linking with Holley Gerth.