Our babiest baby girl has been struggling lately. Because of that, we have ALL been struggling. I want to keep saying she is tired, but that only goes so far.
When we go for walks, her legs get tired quickly. She starts whining, and I tell her she needs to keep doing this so her legs get stronger. Her reply the other day was that her legs are already strong. They hold her up. Sigh.
Then later that night I heard loud yelling from upstairs when the girls were getting ready for bed. I didn’t intervene, because by then I was tired too. Baby K seems to be the instigator lately and lashes out at her big sister.
There are only so many times I can tell my child to quit acting like this. She proclaims to be in a bad mood, but the whole world doesn’t need to know she is in a bad mood.
I got the girls off to bed and just wanted to go to sleep too. The emotional toll this takes on me is too much. They need to grow up and start getting along!
But in my heart I am reminded that I am not always in a good mood. That is life. I need to show my children how to behave the right way. I can tell them to stop acting like this until I am blue in the face, but unless I live it, it means nothing.
We all have hard days and moments and none of us handles them with grace and dignity 100% of the time. (Wouldn’t that be nice?) While we all need to work on not taking out a bad mood on others, it is also important to understand that someone else may be having a rough day and to forgive them without even being asked. We can’t rush to judgment over every little wrong done to us. We would be miserable and that is no way to live!
Now, I am not excusing my young one’s behavior, but I need to make sure she sees kindness and forgiveness from me. I am her model, whether I want to be all the time or not. Both of them look to me for behavior cues, and I better be ready to shine. On days when I mess up, they need to see me apologize and truly mean it.
My job as a parent is to love my children and teach them to be loving and functioning adults. I can only do that when I admit my own faults. This parenting gig is not easy, and it definitely keeps me humble.
One day we will look back on this and laugh, or so I am told. Until then, I am grateful for chocolate!