This summer is flying by and the girls start school August first. Yeah, I know. I wasn’t planning on writing, but this has just been on my heart for days. I woke up today and knew I had to write.
No, we still don’t have a child placed with us. Since we want a school age child, it may not happen until after school starts. Often at that age, it takes a teacher to notice something is off with a child for a problem to be reported. This breaks my heart: the thought of an innocent child being neglected all summer. They are probably hungry, lonely, and think no one cares. We care. So many people care. Here we are with so much love to give and an empty bedroom.
Lately I find myself thinking of the chair in the corner of the room. My Grandma’s rocking chair. Even though we aren’t getting an infant, will a child still sit on my lap late at night? A child who misses their parents and siblings and who doesn’t understand why life is cruel? Will I have the heartbreaking gift of being the one who takes them from body shaking sobs, to cries, to moans and then sighs as they fall asleep? Will I be able to show them stability and teach them to trust night after night from this chair?
The other night I kept thinking about this bedroom and the chair and all they will come to mean. I cried myself to sleep for this child I have never met. I pray for him or her and wait for a call. This is where I am right now. Raw and trusting the fact that God will bring us the right child at the right time. He loves them even more than I do!